on the wall at the junior high dance

Now, this post I'm writing against my instincts. You'll soon find out why...

Once upon a time, I had romantic interest in a young lady. Now, my roommates insisted that she was actually interested in me. I was ambivalent at first, but then began to consider the possibilities, then finally decided to pursue her. As soon as I made this decision, however, she started to completely shut me out. I don't know if we just never got the timing right or what, but regardless I'm married and happy and she seems to be happy, so I guess it all worked out in the end.

At the time, however, all hadn't worked out and life kind of sucked. I have a pretty terrible track record when it comes to the ladies, and for a good while it seemed like I'd never again date anyone, much less get married.

A symbolic evening of the whole ordeal came at a party. Now, I pretty much hate parties - I'm an introvert through and through, and being in the midst of large groups of people wears me out. I went to this party simply because the girl in question was there and I thought I might have the chance to get to know her better. Instead, I ended up spending most of the time hanging out in the kitchen with some casual acquaintances I didn't know very well and walking home alone early. It was not a banner evening.

In reflection upon that dreary night, I composed a song.

This marks the first time I've ever shared a song I wrote with the world. I cringe at what I'm doing here, since the song isn't polished and finished and even if it was I'm not convinced it's that great. I think one mistake I made in my failed pursuits of different girls was letting my reluctance to let myself out get in the way, so maybe I'm trying to right that pattern of behavior. Anyway, here it is.